Habits of Successfully Raising Muslim Children
Following are some useful habits that will be helpful to raise Muslim children successfully.
Something about Raising Muslim Children
The upbringing of a Muslim child is not something ordinary and there is no margin of being a little careless. People belonging to different cultures and beliefs raise their children for a particular purpose. And this goal becomes even higher when it comes to training the Muslim children for one universal cause – The service of Allah. The parents should have a clear distinction between upbringing according to Muslim culture and upbringing according to Islam.
There may be some habits that are part of Muslim culture but they are not part of Islam. So, here is the advice for Muslim parents that they should raise their kids under Islamic principles.
“And those who believe and whose offspring follow them in faith’ to them shall we join their offspring, and we shall not decrease the reward of their deeds in anything.” (Quran 52:21)
Pray for Virtuous Offspring
Dua is a great weapon and every Muslim child deserves it even before his birth. The parents should make a habit of praying for their kids after and before every meeting (sexual intercourse). They should pray to Allah SWT for the righteous kids.
“O, my Lord! Grant me from you, a good offspring. You are indeed the all-Hearer of invocation,’ (Quran, 3:38)
The careful and pious mothers pray for the righteous kids even during pregnancy and keep reciting the verses of the Holy Quran to infuse in them the love for Quran!
Be Yourself a Role Model
Allah SWT has liked parents, raised their status, and entrusted to them the responsibility of the best upbringing and training of their children. So, all Muslim parents should mold themselves according to the pattern of Islam and be role models before their offspring, keeping in view that this responsibility has been assigned to them by Allah SWT.
“Enjoin you Al-Birr (piety and righteousness and each and every act of obedience to Allah SWT) on the people and you forget (to practice it) yourselves.” (Quran,2:44)
There should not be any contrast between the parents’ sayings and doings, otherwise, your kids will develop a divided personality and may become hypocrites!
Remember, children observe all your actions and movements and do the same as they learn by imitation. The responsibility of training the kids applies more to the mother with whom they spend a lot of time. If the mother is refined in personality, good in character, wears a hijab, offers prayers regularly, and speaks gently to her kids, the children will be that way. But if the mother is habitual of using ill language, is not shy, screams and hits, the kids will follow her and do accordingly! So, being Muslim parents, please mind your habits and fulfill your responsibility of raising your children in the best possible manner!
Be Friendly to Your Kids
People feel more relaxed in the company of their friends (as compared to their parents and relatives.) and confidently open their hearts to them. Friendly behavior is most needed in the child-parent relationship. There is no close relationship for kids other than their parents. The mother feeds her child for two years and she should maintain this closeness and physical contact even after breastfeeding.
“It was narrated that Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her), said: “Some Bedouin people came to the Prophet SAWW and said: ‘Do you kiss your children?’ He said: ‘Yes’. He said: ‘But we, by Allah, never kiss (our children)’. The Prophet SAWW said: ‘What can I do if Allah has taken away mercy from you?” (Sanan Ibn Majah 3665, Sahih)
All kids are naughty, intelligent, and active if ever they are wrong, break some toy, or game, or fight with their brother or sister, speak to them softly and guide them using instructive and positive words instead of being harsh and cruel. Bear in mind, your positive attitude will have a great impact on them to keep them on track and they will surely not repeat such mischievous acts!
Deliver Islamic Education to Your Children
Education and purposeful education is the right of every child and Muslim children particularly deserve to be Islamically educated. No doubt, parents invest most care and attention to their children’s education, but that education is not Islamic. When our Holy Prophet Muhammad SAWW asked to seek knowledge, that meant seeking true Islamic knowledge.
Wordily education is beneficial but imparting Islamic education to your kids must not be ignored. It is this education that will install the love and fear of Allah that is responsible to keep them on the right path for the whole of their life.
Start the Islamic education of your kids from your home. When your baby grows up to 6 months to one year, make him learn the first word, ‘Allah’ instead of baba or mama. When he approaches the age of memorizing and uttering words, he should be taught ‘La ilaaha illalah’ (there is no god worthy of worship but Allah), ‘Allah is above’, ‘Sallalaho alehe Wasallam, and the like phrases. Most parents get them to memorize the names of 12 Imams and 4 companions of the Holy Prophet SAWW.
Made them known about the existence of heaven and hell, the Day of Judgment, rewards for virtue, and punishment for sins. Share with them the stories from the life of the Holy Prophet SAWW, Sahabas, and Ahle-Bait as bedtime stories. Guide your kids in the light of Islam and keep providing them step-by-step guidance as per their mental level. Choose those institutes that would educate and train your kids Islamically. Make them understand that the true aim of their life is obedience to Allah and encourage them to be Good Muslims.
Ensure Islam-Friendly Environment in Your Home
It is observed that all the Muslim parents want to train kids in the true sense of Islam but they fail to develop an Islam-friendly environment in their homes which is the backbone of good training. An Islam-friendly environment leaves long-lasting and positive effects on your kid’s personality and proves helpful for you to raise your kids Islamically.
Make sure that the kids should not hear their father abusing their mother, and the same way they may not see their mother disobeying their father. Otherwise, it will prove riskier for your kids; they will never forget such accidents and will repeat the same.
Create an atmosphere of love and affection, following the commandments of Allah SWT and Sunnah of the Holy Prophet Muhammad SAWW if you want the true Islamic upbringing of your children!
Develop Middle Skills in Them
Middle skills are all the manners and etiquette that the parents must not miss in their kids’ upbringing. Be consistent in your dealing with children. I am not going to state the list of manners and good habits that you should transfer to your offspring only theoretically. You would need not advise your kids repeatedly. Just do it yourself (anything, you want to infuse in them) as a strong habit and they will automatically follow it for they observe everything and try to do the same what they see. Make them learn
- Eating manners
- Admitting their fault and avoiding next
- Control Anger
- Use of polite language
- Conversation etiquette
- Sharing their lunch with fellows
- Kill their greed and boost their generosity
- Give alms and help the poor in front of kids
- Make them patient and cooperative
- And many more refined habits
Develop these habits in your kids following them yourselves first. When they grow to age seven start teaching them Salah and you can only spank them at the age of ten if they don’t say prayers regularly. Never slap kids out of anger and hitting them should only be the last solution if they do not at all obey you. Prefer to guide them politely, instill good character, and have firm faith in them. A true Momin should be the consequence of your training!
Children’s upbringing is the true test of the parent’s patience and tolerance. The tips mentioned above will help you develop Islamic habits in your kids. May all the Muslim parents succeed to manage good Islamic homes to raise their children according to Islam! Our online Quran teaching platform (onlinekidsmadrasa.com) is always with you to raise your generation Islamically. Get your kids enrolled in our online Quran learning school and let us play our role in your kids’ Islamic training!
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